Posted by parhad on June 30, 2001 at 00:47:01:
In Reply to: Freddy posted by Michael on June 30, 2001 at 00:29:05:
Well, I do respect and appreciate your honesty as far as revealing your name...if that's really it. Forgive me, but given the number of cowards we are plagued with....
You sound sincere in this post and so I'll respond in the same vein. It wasn't my father's death that made me "doubt god". I don't expect any favors from god or
anyone...and I "blame" nothing on god.
I lost faith in him when I prayed to win a ping pong tournament and got wiped out in the first round. I was nine.
There is a spirit behind this world so grand we can't even begin to contemplate it. Yet you seem to know all about it. When you describe "god"...it becomes a cheap
carnival trick not worth ten cents. The miracles I see and feel are so far beyond the things in the bible, so far beyond loaves and fishes and walking on water and the
rest of it.
If you want Jesus Christ to be good to me or for me...fine let him. If I have to cross the street to get any of these favors, I wouldn't bother. It is unbecoming in the
extreme to believe in something for a "payoff". I believe in the beauty of a flower...it asks nothing of me, nothing at all...I can even crush it and the seed will sprout for
me again and again till someday I notice it and appreciate it for what it is...beauty that exists for its own sake...a gift I can take or leave.
Your notions of god and Jesus sound like those of an tribesman on some deserted island. I would be ashamed myself to own up to such things. I guess you'll just
have to take my word for it when I say I DON'T WANT to be saved and go to your heaven and see your god. I don't understand why that should be so difficult to
accept...lots and lots of people have lived and are living just fine without him. I guess YOU can't imagine being without him. But that's your problem. Who's asking
you to give it up?